Save The World? I Think Not! The Strangest Comic Book Characters (Every Other Tuesday)

Character info found in various DC and Marvel encyclopedias, comicvine.gamespot.com, and Jon Morris’ book, The League Of Regrettable Superheroes

Hello fellow comic book fans! It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to look at the strange characters that appear in comic books. Now, grab your favorite comic, and prepare to laugh!

  • The Blimp Real Name: Herman Cramer Status: Hero Creator: DC First Appeared: Showcase #62 1966 Power:Extremely Slow Flight

Herman was the son of a Flash parody named Captain Swift. Along with super speed, swift could also fly just as fast. Herman got the short end of the stick, and inherited his father’s flight without the speed that went along with it. Useless superpower in hand, The Blimp joined a strange team of equally pathetic heroes known as the Inferior Five. (I can fly! ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ)

the-blimp

  • Stilt-Man Real Name: Wilbur Day Status: Villain Creator: Marvel First Appeared: Daredevil #8 1965 Powers: Legs of armored costume can extend up to 60 feet in length; costume also contains a formidable array of built-in weaponry.

Wilbur was a lab assistant that stole hydraulic rams from his company. He used these parts to create an armored costume. Unfortunately, things didn’t go as planned, and Day became the laughing stock of the Marvel Universe. After many strokes of bad luck, Day met his end at the hands of The Punisher. 

stilt

Save the day? I think not! Useless comic book characters. (Every other Tuesday)

Information on characters found on comicvine.gamespot.com, various DC and Marvel Encyclopedias, and from Jon Morris’ Book,  The League Of Regrettable Superheroes.

Hello fellow comic book fans! It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time to add more members to the roster of useless characters. Get ready to laugh and facepalm as we begin this ridiculous post.

  • Color Kid Real Name: Ulu Vakk  Gender: Male  Status: Good  Power: Can change the color of any object. Creator: DC First Appeared: Adventure Comics #342—-The Legionnaire Who Killed 1966

Color Kid is an alien from the planet Lupra who has one of the most useless powers imaginable. He was rejected from The Legion of Superheroes, and joined The Legion of Substitute Heroes. While his power does seem pretty worthless, it can come in handy in some situations. For example, The Green Lantern’s ring can’t pass through yellow objects, and Color Kid could change the object’s color. He could also distract colorblind enemies.

color 

 

  • Walrus Real Name: Hubert Carpenter Status: Bad Powers: Proportionate strength, agility, and speed of a walrus. First Appeared: Defenders# 131 1984 Creator: Marvel

The Walrus belongs to the strange breed of bizarre villains in the Marvel universe. He got his powers from his uncle’s experiments, and started on a crime spree. Unfortunately for Hubert, his newfound powers were incredibly useless! Humans run faster than Walruses, so it actually reduced his abilities. He became teammates with the equally useless White Rabbit, and they formed the Terrible Two. Their crime spree didn’t last long, as they soon got the crap beaten out of them by Spider-Man and Leap-Frog. It’s implied that they were beaten between huge fits of laughter! 

walrus

Asher’s Jukebox Part 10

Tokyo (Vampires & Wolves) by The Wombats from the album: The Wombats Proudly Present: This Modern Glitch. I have always had a thing for catchy Alternative Rock songs, and this one is just amazing! My great friend showed them to me many years ago, and I thank him from the bottom of my heart. The Wombats are an English band that have a very unique sound. The song starts with a cool piano medley that escalates into a easily hummable beat. The lyrics are also filled to the brim with cool imagery. Check them out ASAP! Tell me what you think in the comment section below.

Happy Listening 😀

Strange Fruits (Fridays)

Cherymoya (Annona cherimola): The Cherymoya is an incredibly strange fruit that is found in the “mountainous regions of South America.” (listverse.com)  It has three different types of skin: “Impressa (indented),Tuberculate (covered in nodules), or intermediate (a combination of Impressa and Tuberculate).” (listverse.com) It is said to have a very pungent odor, and pudding-like consistency. (listverse.com) The Cherymoya supposedly tastes like a mixture of passion fruit, pineapple, papaya, and banana. (listverse.com) It is also noted as Mark Twain’s favorite fruit. This is shown in the quote: “Cherymoya, the most delicious fruit known to men.”  (en.wikipedia.org and listverse.com)

moya

  •  Santol (Sandoricum koetjape) (fruitsinfo.com): The Santol is an interesting fruit that is said to have been native to “former Indochina and Peninsular Malaysia.” (en.wikipedia.org) They come in two different colors, yellow or red. (en.wikipedia.org) It has many different uses, and can be made into marmalades and sauces. (en.wikipedia.org) It also is used in many Thai dishes such as Curry and som tam. (en.wikipedia.org) Santol is said to taste like a combination of “peaches and apples.” (en.wikipedia.org) 

santol

 

Mythical Beasts Of Japan (Wednesdays)

  • Power of prehensile hair! Hari-onago: The Hari-onago is a beautiful, but deadly creature of Japanese folklore. It appears as an ordinary woman with untidy hair. (yokai.com) However, if you look close enough, you can see that  each of the hairs is outfitted with an incredibly sharp hook. (yokai.com) The Hari-onago mainly preys on single men that walk along dark alleyways at night. (yokai.com) When approached, the Hari-onago will smile shyly, and “if the smile is returned, she attacks”! (yokai.com) She lets her hair go wild, and it rips apart the defenceless victim with great speed. (yokai.com) The only way to stop a Hari-onago is to outrun it back home and to wait until sunrise to go back outside. (yokai.com)

hari

 

Strange Musical Instruments (Tuesdays)

  • Ka what? The Kazookeylele is the mutant offspring of a kazoo, toy piano, and ukulele. (mentalfloss.com) It looks much weirder than it sounds! It was invented by Pocket Fox band member Stuart David Crout. (mentalfloss.com) Also, just so you know, Pocket Fox is a Scottish ukulele duo! (mentalfloss.com)

kaz

  • Shocking isn’t it? The incredibly coolly named Zeusaphone is a musical instrument that would make Nicola Tesla blush in his grave! The Zeusaphone is a  large Tesla Coil that was invented in 2007. (oddee and zeusaphone.com) The creators figured out a way to control the high-frequencies of the electrical currents in order to both make music and amplify other instruments. (oddee and zeusaphone.com) The name of this device comes from the Greek god of Lightning, Zeus. (oddee.com)

zeus

  • So Cool! The Singing Ringing Tree is a very dynamic piece of architecture that is located on the Pennine moors. (theguardian.com) It stands 3 meters high and is covered with pipes.(theguardian.com) The pipes produce chilling and strange sounds when wind passes through them. (theguardian.com) It is quite an amazing site to behold! I think that it is probably one of the most interesting and surreal sculptures ever created.   It was created in 2006 by British architects Mike Tonkin and Anna Liu. (theguardian.com)

srt

 

 

 

Toys: The Wierd, Bizarre, and Anger Inducing (Mondays)

  • Monster Science Colossal Water Balls: Ah, the old water growing dinosaur things, they were already just okay and would’ve been all right if little kids didn’t drink the contents of the disturbingly named “growth powder”. This caused life-threatening episodes of vomiting and dehydration, and if that wasn’t the icing on the shock cake, the powder was impossible to X-ray and required SURGERY TO REMOVE! (Recalled) (listverse.com)

mscb

  • INSTANT UNICORN: Dive Sticks: These fun little waterproof chunks of plastic were a lot more deadly that they seem. They have had a nasty habit of impaling many kids. (Banned in 1999 and redesigned to be much safer) (mentalfloss.com)

DIEvesticks

  • The CSI Fingerprint Examination Kit would have been a cool Junior Crime Investigation toy, however the finger print dust was 7% asbestos! (Dear god!) (listverse.com) (Recalled) (!!&%#%!@*)&!#& WTF!)

csi)(   asbestos

  • Sky Dancers aka Flying lacerating machines. These death machines could be propelled though the air and gently land on the ground. However, the sharp skates did everything from knocking out teeth to causing blindness. (Recalled). (teen.com, and dangerdolan youtube channel)