Crazy Pokemon Clover Pokedex Entries (Every Other Monday)

NSFW Content Ahead!

Hello fellow Pokemon trainers! It’s Monday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to take a look at some crazy Pokedex entries. Now, let’s begin!

  • Ogrelord (The ALL OGRE Pokemon) #123 Pure Dark Type Based off of: Shrek and his Memes. Ability: Sturdy (Can retain one hit that would faint it) or Victory Star (Increases accuracy of all moves by 10%) Gender Ratio: 87.5% Male/ 12.5% Female Doesn’t evolve, but is the counterpart of Chantruth. Ht: 6’11” Wt: 953.1 lbs Stats: HP: 100 Attack: 130 Defense: 80 Sp. Atk: 65 Sp. Def: 81 Speed: 70 Base Stat Total: 526 (Pretty Good) Weak to Bug, Fighting, and Fairy Appearance: A spherical ogre with green skin and red spines.

Entry: Ogrelord is VERY protective of its swamp and will attack trespassers brutally. It cultivates its own onions. (It’s cry is GAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!)

ogrelord

  • Baddon (The Dildo Pokemon) #147 Pure Dragon Type (Legendary) Based off of: A box of dragon dildos. Ability: Rough Skin (Hurts those who make physical contact with it) or Infiltrator (Ignores the effects of barriers) Gender: Male only Doesn’t evolve Ht: 2’04” Wt: 110.2 lbs Stats: HP: 73 Attack: 136 Defense: 148 Sp. Atk: 121 Sp. Def: 112 Speed: 50 Base Stat Total:640 (The highest base stat total of all Dragon types and the highest Defense and Special Defense of all Dragon types) Appearance: A peach-colored box with a red, purple, and green dragon-shaped dildo in it. Weak to Ice, Dragon, and Fairy.

Entry: In old times, Baddon were used as tools of war. They penetrated enemy forts with powerful thrusts. They were since hidden.

baddon.jpg

 

  • Sesquatch (The Ses Pokemon) #368 Normal and Ghost type Based off of: Sasquatch and the “Suddenly ses” meme. Ability: Mummy (Changes target’s ability to Mummy with physical contact) Gender Ratio: 50% Male/ 50% Female Doesn’t evolve Ht: 7’10” Wt: 176.4 lbs Stats: HP: 95 Attack: 90 Defense: 105 Sp. Atk: 55 Sp. Def: 95 Speed: 70 Base Stat Total: 510 (Good plus awesome typing) Appearance: A sasquatch-like creature with brown and white fur, sharp teeth, and a long nose. Immune to Ghost, Normal, and Fighting types. Weak to Dark.

Entry: Legends tell of a man that went into the forest to hunt this creature. He became distracted by a strange scent, when suddenly, [spoiler]ses [/spoiler] (Its cry is a demonic “ses” sound)

ses.jpg   

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Even More Creepy Pokedex Entries (Every Other Wednesday)

Hello fellow Pokemon Trainers! It’s Wednesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to take a look at some more scary entries. Now, let’s begin!

  • Cofagrigus (The Coffin Pokemon) Ghost Type Ability: Mummy Evolves from Yamask at level 34 Ht: 5’07” Wt: 168.7 lbs 

Pokemon X Pokedex entry: It has been said that they swallow those who get too close and turn them into mummies. They like to eat gold nuggets. (O_O!)

cofagrigus

  • Palossand (The Sand Castle Pokemon) Ground and Ghost type Ability: Sand Veil or Water Compaction Evolves from Sandygast at level 42 Ht: 4’03” Wt: 551.2 lbs

Pokemon Sun Pokedex Entry: Each of its grains of sand has its own will. Palossand eats small Pokemon and siphons away their vital essence while they’re still alive. (What a way to go!)

palo

Asher’s Game Reviews (One Every Two Months)

This post discusses some pretty controversial subject matter. You have been warned!

The Binding of Isaac+the various expansions Creators: Edmund McMillen, Nicalis, Tyrone Rodriguez, Florian Himsl (Only for the initial Flash versions) Music: Danny Baranowsky (For the Flash game) Matthias Bossi and Jon Evans (For Rebirth and Afterbirth), Mudeth (For Antibirth)  Release Dates: Vanilla Isaac (September 28, 2011) Wrath of the Lamb (May 28, 2012) Rebirth (November 4, 2014) Afterbirth (October 30, 2015) Antibirth (December 23, 2016) Afterbirth+ (March 17, 2017) Genres: Roguelike, dungeon crawler Platforms: PC, 3DS, Switch, Xbox One, PS4, IOS, Wii U, Linux, PS Vita, Mac OS  ESRB Rating: M for Blood and gore, Violence, and Crude humor

This is one of my absolute favorite video games, and I have been following it since its Newgrounds demo in 2011. I was always a fan of McMillen’s work, and this project was no exception. It was originally made in Flash, but the speed of the engine was quite slow, and the frame rate often glitched up. During Rebirth, the product was completely remodeled, and the game moved at a much faster rate. A year later, a new expansion called Afterbirth was created. During the wait for the latest expansion, the community made an exceptional add on known as Antibirth. The last expansion made was Afterbirth +, and this allowed people to mod the game by creating new items, characters, bosses, and floors.  The game tells the story of Issac, a bald child that lives with his extremely religious mother. One day, Issac’s mother hears the voice of God, which tells her to sacrifice her son. Upon hearing this, Issac rushes to his room and quickly locks the door. He then finds a trapdoor hidden under his rug, and the game begins. You travel through various worlds, fighting monsters, collecting items, defeating bosses, and eventually facing your own mother. In the PC version, Isaac moves around with the WASD keys, and fires tears with the arrow keys. These tears are Isaac’s main form of attack, and can be changed around with the astronomical number of items in the game. You always start the run in the Basement or Cellar, which is comprised of two floors. You also have a money counter, bomb counter, and key counter, which max out at 99. Upon pausing the game, can see your stats, which are divided into health, damage, tear rate, range, shot speed, speed, and luck. Each of the 14 characters have different stats, and these either make the game harder or easier.  The floors contain various enemies, secret rooms, libraries, bedrooms, I Am Error rooms, sacrifice rooms, boss battles, item rooms, shops, arcades, and devil or angel rooms depending on your game style. You start at zero percent of both angel and devil, and depending on what you pick up, increasing or decreases it. You boost the devil chances by literally selling your hearts for power, collecting satanic items, like a pentagram, going into curse rooms, and blowing up beggars. Angel deals are more defensive in nature, however some of the best items appear here. While they’re rarer than devil deals, they can be picked up without any life cost. The items can be categorized into two different categories, Active and Passive. Active items take up a spot above your character, and can be used at different times depending on the recharge time. Passive items are permanent increasing or decreasing items, which can grant Isaac new tears and cosmetic changes. Some of these items can be extremely unsettling, like Proptosis, which causes Isaac’s eyes to bulge and fire large, rapidly shrinking tears. Trinkets, Runes, Tarot Cards, Playing Cards, and Pills also play a major role in the game. These are all, with an exception of trinkets, single use items that have a variety of useful and horrific effects. The trinkets are collectables that contain passive bonuses, and you can usually only have one of these at a time. The main appeal of Isaac, is that every run is randomized, which can lead to incredible game-breaking item synergies and completely different playing styles. I have had many amazing and chaotic runs due to this feature, and it is always exhilarating to see what the RNG has out for you. Now, the game does have permadeath, which means if you die, you can’t continue the run. The game has a steep difficulty curve, especially with some of the characters. (This means “you” The Lost!) However, if you can look past this, you will find out why I love it so much. I also can’t go on without discussing the soundtrack. The original game’s music was composed by the amazing Danny Baranowsky, who also did music for Super Meat Boy. The pieces are extremely well written, and invoke a multitude of emotions for the different parts of the game. Bossi and Evans composed the Rebirth and Afterbirth soundtracks, which are also fantastic. Then, we get to Mudeth’s Antibirth soundtrack, and my god, this is 100% ear candy. From the super catchy basement theme, to the dark and theremin-heavy womb theme, this is my all time favorite music in Issac. I highly recommend this game to Roguelike enthusiasts, and fans of the first Legend of Zelda, but be warned, many of the items and subject matter is very disturbing and sacrilegious. If you can look past this, you’re in for a hell of a good time!

Final Rating: 10/10 (Absolutely Incredible!)

Here’s a link to the womb theme, it’s fantastic!

 

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwjmj8Pz7vvZAhXIyoMKHWlTCooQtwIIKTAA&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DFGWkTYMdt8Y&usg=AOvVaw3kztuHJqcE1rF5wfEejWJ_

Strange SCPs (The Last Wednesday of the Month)

Hello fellow researchers! It’s time for a special end of the month post! I have written many posts on the SCP foundation in the past, so why not bring back an old flame? Now, let’s begin today’s research!

  • SCP-162 The Ball of Sharp  Object Class: Euclid

Description: SCP-162 is a mass of fish hooks, fish line, needles, scissors, and other sharp objects in a rough ball shape close to 2.4 m (8 ft) in width and 2.1 m (7 ft) in height. After being in SCP-162’s vicinity, subjects have reported feeling drawn to the object in order to touch it. This desire can extend for several weeks after seeing the item, becoming an obsession in many cases. The “draw” increases the more the object is observe, and people will become violent if pulled away from it.

If handled, the hooks will be embedded in the subject’s skin. The experience is extremely painful, much more so than normal fish hooks.  Struggling or attempting to escape will result in complete entrapment on the surface of SCP-162. Subjects will bleed profusely, resulting in death after a prolonged period of time. The only apparent cure for the entrapment is to release SCP-1114 on it. While the entrapment will stop, the compulsion to touch SCP-162 won’t go away.

ball of sharp       

 

  • SCP-312 The Atmospheric Jellyfish Object Class: Euclid 

Description: SCP-312 is an organism composed of very thin tissue layers and filled with atmospheric gases at a slightly higher temperature than the surrounding air. It floats approximately (BLANK) meters above the ground, although it will vary this in order to maintain its position relative to prey.

SCP-312  can create clouds and manipulate air currents. It also has multiple eyes that it uses to detect prey. It has powerful tentacles that can paralyze prey if looked at. 

scp 312

More Obscure Music Genres

Hello everyone! It’s time for me to bring back an old favorite! About a year ago, I jumped into the fascinating world of obscure music genres. I have always found this topic to be quite interesting with new genres added almost daily. Now, let’s dive into the most unique and weird genres that music has to offer!

  • Noise Rock Created: 1968 Prominent Bands: Melt-Banana, Metz, Big Black

Noise Rock is a Punk-inspired genre with large distortion levels,  occasionally unintelligible vocals, sharp and intense sounds, and blindingly fast guitar riffs and strange lyrics. Many Japanese bands of this genre also started to rise in the early 60’s. While most of it is very painful to the ears, some is quite enjoyable like Sonic Youth and Velvet Underground.

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwj4qNHv3ZnYAhWG2yYKHW05A4EQtwIITDAF&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DXAug_UmsTgQ&usg=AOvVaw1WxZ_T6YGDexfRdS31aRFB

 

  • Glitch Hop Created: 1997 Prominent Producers: Virtual Riot, Mr. Bill, GRiZ 

Glitch Hop is a subgenre of Glitch that uses malfunctioning electronics and fusion of Hip Hop to create incredibly catchy, video game-inspired pieces. It’s also influenced by Dubstep and drum and bass. The pieces are usually played at 110 BPM.

 

October Special! More Creepy Pokedex Entries

Hello fellow Pokemon trainers! It’s Wednesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to take a look at the dark side of this series. Now, prepare to be shocked!

  • Trevenant (The Elder Tree Pokemon) (Based off of the Kodama) Ghost and Grass Type Size: 4’11” 156.5 lbs First Appeared: Generation VI

Trevenant and its first form, Phantump have some of the most disturbing Pokedex entries of all time. It resembles a spider-like tree with a giant red eye and two pincer-like claws.

Omega Ruby Pokedex Entry: It can control trees at will. It will trap people who harm the forest so they can never leave. (O_O)

treve

 

Now for probably the most messed up entry ever!

Yamask (The Spirit Pokemon) (Based off of the Egyptian Ba holding a death mask)

Ghost Type Size: 1’08” 3.3 lbs First Appeared: Generation V

Yamask is a downright upsetting creature with a shadowy body.

 Pokemon Black Pokedex Entry: Each of them carries a mask that used to be its face when it was human. Sometimes they look at it and cry. (“E” for everyone my ass!)

yamask     

Even More Messed Up Comic Book Characters (Every Tuesday for October)

Hello fellow comic book fans! It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to take a look at some more messed up characters. Now, grab your favorite Graphic Novel, and let’s begin!

  • Black Hand Real Name: William Hand Status: Misanthrope First appeared: Green Lantern#29 (June 1, 1964 DC Comics) Powers/Abilities: Using the black power ring, William can reanimate the dead, and steal energy by killing his victims and eviscerating their hearts

William was raised in a mortuary, and became disturbingly fascinated with the dead bodies. His interest in the dead became a major problem with his family. He soon was being stalked by the Red Lantern known as Atrocitus. This eventually lead Hand to insanity, and he brutally murdered his family before taking his own life. Instead of dying, he became reanimated as a Black Lantern. He became a major thorn in Hal Jordan’s side, and even killed his father in cold blood. After being reborn for this fourth time, he finally meets his permanent end at the hands of the Source Wall.

black hand

 

  • Johnny Sorrow Real Name: N/A Status: Super Villain First Appeared: Secret Origins of Super Villains #1 (December 1, 1999 DC Comics) Powers/Abilities: His own face kills anyone who looks at it (he isn’t immune to this), teleportation, limited intangibility, mask reformation, communication through dimensions, magic manipulation, levitation

Johnny Sorrow was originally a silent movie actor who wanted to move to talkies. He stole a special Subspace Prototype, which made his body intangible. He used this to commit crimes. He was easily caught by the “Dream Lord”, Sand. He transported Sorrow into a horrific dimension known as the Subtile Realms. He then met the dastardly King of Tears, who made him his servant. Upon returning to Earth, Sorrow found out that his face had been horribly disfigured. The sight of his visage was so disturbing, that whoever looked at it would die of shock. He continues his life of crime, and is sent back to the Subtile Realms after the King of Tears dies.

 

 

  • Emplate Real Name: Marius St. Croix Status: Terrorist First Appeared: Generation X #1 (November 1994 Marvel Comics) Unusual Features: Looks like a dry emaciated corpse with purple artery-like veins running down his body. He also has blood red pupils and gray skin. Powers/Abilities: Feeds on the bone marrow of mutants to remain on this physical plane (this cancels out their powers and gives them their abilities), extreme durability, extraordinary tracking abilities, can transform others into abominations like himself, limited invisibility

Marius was born into a very rich family, and lived quite a lavish childhood. This all changed, however, when he turned into a teenager. He was overwhelmed with hunger, and accidentally killed his mother. He was then exiled from his family, and moved towards the study of dark magic. He was eventually found by his sisters, and banished into a different dimension. Inside the dimension, Emplate learns about his powers and his major weakness. He must live aided by a giant purple respirator. If he doesn’t continue to consume mutant’s bone marrow, he will be pulled into a dimension of unspeakable torture. (Geez, what a life!)

emplate