Strange Urban Dictionary Entries

Warning! This post can be extremely NSFW for some people. Read at your own risk!

Hello fellow literally fanatics! It’s time to get scandalous with a new Urban Dictionary post. I hope you guys are ready for some truly shocking entries. Now, let’s begin!

  • Munter:  Noun: An ugly woman. (British Slang) That is one fat munter!
  • Kontol: Indonesian synonym for Penis.
  • Assclown: Noun: A person who doesn’t know what the hell they’re talking about.
  • Fun Bags: (Slang for a women’s breasts).
  • VPILF: Vice President I’d Like to Fuck
  • Droo: Another word for dope, weed, hash etc.
  • Pipa: A glass pipe for smoking Crystal Meth.
  • CID: Caffeine induced dump.
  • Malta Goya: A substance so terrible that its creators should be murdered, or worse, forced to drink it themselves.
  • Halitosis: When your mouth and asshole smell the same.

 

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More Crappy Book Covers

Hello fellow book lovers! It’s time for another humorous art post. Today, we will be looking at some more bad covers. Now, let’s take a dive into the bizarre world of  hilarious cringe.

  • Angela’s Arm by Roland Allnach Release Date: October 30th, 2018 Genres: Horror and Suspense 204 Pages Small Summary: A tale about a girl with a serpent for an arm.

Ok, I actually kind of love this cover because it reminds me of one of my favorite Anime. Unfortunately, it isn’t perfect, and I can see a lot of room for improvement. First of all, the hand has six fingers, which means that the owner isn’t human. Second, the book’s title is written in the standard “blood red” text to emphasize that it’s scary and edgy.  Lastly, the background looks photoshopped.

angela

 

  • Civil War II: The Battle for the Future of America by E. Robert Gurr Release Date: May 3rd, 2019 295 Pages Genres: Political Thriller and Suspense Short Summary: A war pits a teacher and a hacker against each other.

This cover is the epitome of boring and wasted potential. It’s just text on a white background. It tells nothing of what happens in the book, and looks like it was pieced together in about five minutes. Also, we gotta be edgy, so there’s more of that laughable “blood red” text.

gurr

Bad Video Game Cover Art

Hello fellow gamers, and welcome to an old topic! I loved critiquing bad video game art in the past, and decided to give it another go. Now, let’s facepalm and cringe at some true garbage!

  •  Brawl Brothers for the SNES Genre: Beat em’ Up (1992) Plot: The sequel to Rushing Beat that has players beating up hordes of bad guys. Publisher: Jaleco 

I always have loved Beat em’ Ups, and find them to be mindless fun. This specific game was heavily praised by critics for its graphics and fluid gameplay. Unfortunately the cover is complete crap! We get this “ultra-cool” beefcake guy breaking out of a brick wall. His face is contorted like he’s constipated, and his nose  is bulbous and phallic. If the artists had taken more time on this piece, it could be pretty to look at, but as of now, it’s trash!

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  • Art of Fighting for the Sega Mega Drive (1992) Creator: SNK Genre: Fighting Description  The first game of the Art of Fighting trilogy that pits players against each other, and mixes up the game with some desperation attacks. 

Ugh! This series of fighting games are very clunky, and many of the characters are extremely overpowered. However, it is also famous for starting the “super attacks” in many of the popular fighters of today. The artwork for this game is all over the place, with some parts being awesome, and others being disturbing. Most of the work looks like a cheesy 80’s action film with bell-bottom jeans, a bright orange karate gis. Then, we get to the faces, and all hell breaks loose! Robert Garcia’s face is pseudo-realistic which really blurs the line, and makes the viewer feel uncomfortable. Then, we get to Ryo, who has a giant leg, and appears to be kicking a goon right in the face. The goon is the best part of the piece, and his face is contorted into pure exaggerated pain.

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More Crazy Pokemon Clover Pokedex Entries (Every Other Monday)

NSFW Content Ahead!

Hello fellow Pokemon Trainers! It’s Monday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to look at some more crazy entries. Now, let’s begin!

  • Oreon (The Good Cookie Pokemon) #243 Fairy/Dark Type Ability: Super Luck (Critical hits have a higher chance of appearing) Ht: 3’03” Wt: 59.5 lbs Appearance: Some sort of quadruped beast with an Oreo body. Gender Ratio: 87.5% Male/ 12.5% Female Base Stats: HP: 95, Attack: 60, Defense: 65, Sp.Atk: 130, Sp. Def: 65, Speed: 110 Base Stat Total 525 (Highest Base Special Attack Stats of all non-legendary Fairy and Dark types) Immune to Dragon and Psychic and Weak to Poison, Fairy, and Steel

Entry: These Pokemon started coming out of strange yellow wings in islands and spread out due to humans.

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  • Oburonyxo (The Monarch Pokemon) #157 Rock/Fairy Type Ability: Solid Rock (Powers down Super Effective Moves) Evolves from Sylvuin at Level 36 and the final form of Faerlock Appearance: A fearsome purple serpent coming out of a rock. Gender Ratio: 87.5 Male/ 12.5% Female Ht: 7’10” Wt: 417.8 lbs Base Stats: HP: 80, Attack: 70, Defense: 100, Sp. Atk: 90, Sp. Def: 125, Speed: 60 Base Stat Total 525 ( Highest base Special Defense of all Rock and Fairy Types) Immune to Dragon and Weak to Ground,Grass, Water, and Steel (4x weak)

Entry: Fairy Pokemon idolize them for their gallant nature. Their magic is strong enough to demolish a tank. 

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More Awesome TV Tropes

Hello fellow pop culture enthusiasts! It’s time for another tropes post. I hope you guys are ready for some awesome pop cultural trivia! Now, let’s begin!

  • Power Creep: A trope that’s highly popular in video games, especially the card variety. It occurs when new content in a game completely trumps the old content. This can be done by adding a new upgrade to an old card, weapon, or other object. Some examples include; Magma Rager from Hearthstone. This card used to be played a lot because of its high attack for low cost. Unfortunately, after Ice Rager was made, the card became completely useless. Next, we have Kartana from the Pokemon series. It is one of the fastest and strongest  Pokemon out there, however, its Special Defense is really lacking, and it can be taken out easily by Special Attackers. Lastly, we have Zoodiacs from Yu-Gi-Oh! This archetype was so broken upon release that many tournaments refused to have players use decks based upon them.

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  • Mid NSFW Warning On This One! Marshmallow Hell: This is a heavily used trope in many Ecchi Anime and Hentai. It occurs when a character is suffocated between a taller girl’s massive “tracts of land”. Some examples include; Irina suffocating Nagisa in Assassination Classroom, Litchi suffocating multiple characters in Blazblue, and Angel’s reverse motorboat from King of Fighters XIV.

litchi.jpg Litchi aka Boobie Lady (Nickname by Taokaka)

 

More Crazy Pokemon Clover Pokedex Entries (Every Other Monday)

NSFW Content Ahead!

Hello fellow Pokemon Trainers! It’s Monday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to take a look at some more crazy entries. Now, let’s begin!

  • Maripyro (The Cheese Bug Pokemon) #318 Bug/Fire Type Possible Abilities: Gooey (Lowers Speed on contact) or Magic Guard (Prevents indirect damage) Ht: 10’06” Wt: 202.8 lbs Gender Ratio: 50/50 Appearance: A moth made out of Doritos. Base Stats: HP: 80, Attack: 125, Defense: 75, Sp.Atk: 75, Sp.Def: 90, Speed: 95 Stat Total: 540 (Very high Attack and pretty good Speed) Evolves from  Fuermiga at Level 40 Weak to Flying, Water, and 4X weak to Rock.

Entry: Female Maripyro are twice as big as their male counterpart and can cut an Indian Elephant in half with their mouth.

maripyro

 

  • Derpato (The Confused Pokemon) #238 Ground Type Gender Ratio: 50/50 Appearance: A very confused potato. Ability: Oblivious (Prevents infatuation) Ht: 1’00 Wt: 2.6 lbs Base Stats: HP: 68, Attack: 52, Defense: 50, Sp.Atk: 45, Sp.Def: 40, Speed: 20 (Ok stats for a 1st evolution) Evolves into Retater at Level 40 and Potarded at Level 60 Its cry is Duuurrr. Immune to Electric and weak to Water, Grass, and Ice.

Entry: Derpato take one hour to concentrate their inner energy to attack, then must take two hours to rest.

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Cinema Obscura Part 1

Hello everyone, and welcome to a brand new topic! Strange cinema has always intrigued me, and I have finally decided to give it the significance it deserves. Every two weeks, I will be discussing some new strange films. Now, let’s go on a strangely epic adventure!

  • Freaks (1932) Unrated Directed by: Tod Browning Written by: Clarence Aaron Robbins, Leon Gordon, and Willis Goldbeck. Starring: Wallace Ford, Leila Hyams, and Olga Baclanova. Genres: Horror, Drama 64 mins Black and White

This highly controversial film ended Tod Browning’s career. The movie starred actual freakshow performers, and people thought it was extremely hard to watch because of it.  It’s the story of a beautiful trapeze artist named Cleopatra. She falls in love with a little person, but is really just after his inheritance. During a dinner party, she becomes intoxicated and verbally attacks the freaks. They respond by horrifically mutilating her body. She becomes a freak, and her new appearance is terrifying. If I ever watch this film, I will review it in its entirety.

freaks

 

  • Street Trash (1987) Unrated (Probably R) for Blood and Gore, Strong Language, Offensive Humor, Gross-out Humor, Sex, Alcohol Consumption, and Disturbing Scenes Directed by:  James M. Muro Written by: Roy Frumkes Starring: Mike Lackey, Vic Noto, and Bill Chepil Genres: Comedy, Horror Run Time: 91 minutes Color 

This ultra-bizarre film, along with The Stuff, The Fly, Terrordome, and The Incredible Melting Man started the sub genre of Body Horror known as Melting Movies. The story is about a liquor store owner that finds a strange case of alcohol known as Viper. He ends up selling the booze to hobos for $1, and calamity ensues! The hobos begin to melt quite graphically with tons of CGI gore and sound effects. Seems like a stupidly fun film that I definitely want to watch someday.

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