Creepy Pokedex Entries (Every Wednesday for the Month of October)

Hello everyone, and welcome to another look at a well-loved topic! As said before, I am a huge fan of the Pokemon franchise. I adore the gigantic amount of characters and their very unique designs. One of the most important tools in a Pokemon Trainer’s arsenal is the Pokedex, a compendium of all the various creatures you will meet on your journey. Despite the “E” rating, Japan has managed to put some pretty disturbing information into the dex. It becomes less of a children-friendly game, and more of a horror story. So, to celebrate the month of Halloween, I will be adding the most bizarre and messed up entries that I can find. Now, let’s dive into the amazing world of Pokemon!

  •    Bruxish  The Gnash Teeth Pokemon (Based off of a filefish or reef triggerfish) 

Size: 2″11 Weight: 41.9lbs

Bruxish is a water/psychic fish Pokemon from Generation VII. It’s quite colorful, and has a mouth that’s full of sharp teeth. They can be caught from fishing spots in the Secluded Shore.

Pokedex entry from Pokemon Moon: It stuns its prey with psychokinesis and grinds them to mush with its strong teeth. Even Shelder’s shell is no match for it. (Yes brutal death, totally a kid’s game!)

brux.jpg

 

  • Dusclops The Beckon Pokemon (Based off of a Hitotsume-kozo)

Size: 5’03” Weight: 67.5 lbs

Dusclops is a pure ghost type Pokemon from Generation III. It’s a fairly large, cyclopean ghost with a grey body that resembles bandages on a mummy. It can be found be leveling up Duskull to level 37.

Pokedex entry from Omega Ruby: Dusclops’s body is completely hollow—–there is nothing at all inside. It is said that its body is like a black hole. This Pokemon will absorb anything into its body, but nothing will ever come back out. (O_O)

dusclos 

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The Crappiest Video Game Cover Art (Every Other Wednesday)

“Art” found on various websites

Hello fellow gamers! It’s Wednesday, and you know what that means!  Yes, it’s time to cringe, as we look at some horrible cover art. Now, let the crapfest begin!

  • Dudes With Attitude for the NES (1990) 

Dudes With Attitude was a piss poor action/adventure game for the NES. The object of the game is to use the “dudes” to collect colored gems and avoid the evil Gumsplats. Unfortunately the game had horrible controls and graphics. The cover doesn’t do anything to numb the pain, and is in fact, scary as hell! The art depicts 3 sentient balls surrounding a treasure chest. The leftmost figure is a blue female with black shades and a pucker mouth. The rightmost image is a yellow male with spiky hair, and a “shit eating” grin. The middlemost image is the fugliest of them all, and depicts a red male ball with an eyepatch, mustache, and demonic grin. This is completely unsettling, and causes the viewer to stay away from this abomination. (Come on, artists! You can do bettter than this!)

dudes with 

 

  • Final Zone II for the Turbo Grafx 16 (1990)

Final Zone II is a wonderfully fun shooter that’s quite similar to Ikari Warriors. If you have watched the Happy Console Gamer, there are chances that you have heard of this game. Two covers were made, one for Japan, and one for North America. The Japanese one is very cool, and portrays the main characters in an Anime style. The North American cover, other the other hand, is a giant pile of vomit! The artist must have been hitting the crack pipe pretty hard when he birthed this monstrosity! The character’s proportions are completely askew, and the faces look like grotesque bobble heads. The robot suits are morbidly obese, and the weapons look like construction equipment! Tell me what you think of this shitshow in the comments’ section below.

final zone 2 

Nature Is Awesome! (Every Other Tuesday)

All animals and other organisms found in various books and websites

Hello fellow outdoor enthusiasts! It’s Tuesday and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time to take a look at some more amazing organisms. Now, let’s start exploring!

  • Sundew (Drosera) Diet: Carnivorous  Size: Up to 100cm Habitat: Every Continent besides Antarctic. Every species is divided into several habitats based on climate.

The Sundew is a strange, carnivorous plant that’s nearly found world wide. It has green leaves and many reddish tentacles. These tentacles are covered in a sticky digestive enzymes, which are used to attract prey. The sweet smelling secretion attracts insects, and when they get too close, it attacks! The tentacle trap the poor bug, and begin to digest its body. After the bug’s demise, its nutrients will be absorbed through the leaves to the other parts of the plant. The Sundew also has many medicinal purposes such as being used in teas to prevent whooping cough and asthma attacks. 

sundew 

 

  • Corpse Flower (Rafflesia arnoldii) Size: 3 ft (The largest was 3.4 ft) Diet: Parasitic Habitat: The Rainforests of Sumatra Status: Becoming Endangered

The Rafflesia has the Guinness World Record for being the largest individual flower on Earth. It’s a parasitic organism that’s pollinated by Corpse Flies. It’s a bright red flower with many large, spotted leaves. It’s unisexual, and male and female flowers must be close by for successful pollination.  It can weigh up to a mighty 24 lbs, and is continuously dying out due to increased human activity. This disturbs the bud production of the plant.  The nickname, “Corpse Flower”, comes from the plant’s stench, which is said to resemble rotten flesh. It’s truly a fascinating plant that we must try to protect before they all become extinct.   

raflesia.jpg

Hall Of Shame: The Strangest Comic Book Characters (Every Other Tuesday)

Characters found in various DC and Marvel encyclopedias, and comicvine.gamespot.com

Hello fellow comic book lovers! It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to take a look at some more ridiculous characters. Now, grab your favorite Graphic Novel, and let’s begin!

  • Black Talon Real Name: Samuel David Barone Status: Villain First Appeared: Avengers #152 (October 1976) Creator: Marvel Powers/Weapons: Limited necromancy, metal talons on boots and gloves

Samuel was a powerful voodoo priest with a legion of zombies at his command. He donned a chicken head crest and worked for the villainous Grim Reaper. He tried to  attack New York City with his zombies, but was stopped and shot to death by The Punisher. (While his powers are pretty strong, his overall design is just hilarious!)

 black talon

  • Mirage Real Name: Desmond Charne Status: Villain Creator Marvel First Appeared: Amazing Spider-Man #156 (1976) Powers/Weapons: Creation of illusionary self-duplicates

Desmond was a hologram technician that decided to become a villain. He created a power suit that granted him hologram manipulation. He started his criminal career by robbing from weddings and other society events. One of these weddings was being photographed by Peter Parker. He stopped Mirage by dropping a chandelier on his head. After many failed crime sprees, Desmond was shot to death by the Scourge of the Underworld. 

mirage

More Crappy Video Game Cover Art (Every Other Tuesday)

STRONG PROFANITY WARNING!!

Art found on various websites

Hello fellow gamers! It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time for us to cringe profusely at some horrible video game cover art. Now, lets begin this adventure into the detritus of the video game world!

  • Fester’s Quest for the NES (1989) Genre: Adventure/Run and Gun

If you have been watching the Angry Video Game Nerd for as long as I have, you have probably seen his review for this game. According to James Rolfe; “This game is ass”! It’s a run and gun adventure game that stars Uncle Fester from the Addam’s Family. Unfortunately, the cover doesn’t do anything to ease the pain! It depicts the titular Fester as a bald, Curly Howard-looking, buffoon with incredibly red lips. He almost gives off the vibe of a pedophile with the strange sneer. There’s also a single spider hanging down from his head. If I can give the artwork any praise, I’d say that the mansion in the distance actually looks pretty good. The piece all together just rubs me the wrong way, and I don’t know if the creator was aiming for this or not. Tell me what you think of this “masterpiece” in the comments’ section below.

fest'.jpg 

 

  • Bust-A-Move Arcade 2 Edition for the Playstation (1995) Genre: Puzzle

I have already discussed one of the crazy covers before in an earlier post, but this one is just Fucked Up! As I said before, Bust-A-Move is an incredibly addicting puzzle game starring the dragons Bub and Bob of Bubble Bobble fame. The game had very cute graphics and exhilarating gameplay. Then we get to the cover, and all I can say is, WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING!!! We have an image that wouldn’t look out of place in a Clockwork Orange! The cover has various bubbles with screaming faces inside. Their eyes are pried open with toothpicks, and they appear to be in great distress. I especially “adore” the tagline; “SO ADDICTIVE…IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL”! It’s crazy, because this is a rated “E” game! I’m going to show the cover, but be warned, it’s really unsettling! Tell me what you think of it in the comments’ section below.

bust a move   

The Worst Video Game Cover Art (Every Other Wednesday)

STRONG LANGUAGE AHEAD!

Art found on various websites

Hello fellow gamers! It’s Wednesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time to cringe as we look at some more horrible art. Now, let the cringefest begin!

  •  The Legend Of The Mystical Ninja for the Super Nintendo (1991)

This was a great action-adventure game starring Goemon. The music and Japanese art style is wonderful to look at. Unfortunately, this can’t be said about the cover art! This cover seems pretty racist towards Japanese people, and is in extremely poor taste. Goemon’s blue hair is depicted as black, and his eyes are slanted. Then we get to his slanted, caterpillar-like eyebrows and our fury starts to rise. He’s riding a tiger that looks completely out of place in the game, and he’s being attack by a screwed up amalgamation of characters. These include; fireballs with crossed out eyes, a samurai with duck lips, a crazed monkey, and a demonic baby’s ring toy. The artist must have been hitting the Meth pretty hard to come up with this racist pile of goat shit!

LegendOfTheMythicalNinjaCover 

 

  • Freestyle Metal X for the Playstation 2 

This was a dirt-bike racing game with an awesome Metal soundtrack. Unfortunately the covers of the game were the stuff of nightmares! The Playstation 2 cover features a screaming biker with an abnormally large mouth. It’s so big, that multiple versions of itself are placed inside it. This creates a bizarre, yet awesome tunnel. I can’t really tell if I like or dislike the cover, but I’ll tell you one thing, it’s going to be in your nightmares for the next few weeks!

 fmx

Hall Of Shame: The Strangest Comic Book Characters (Every Other Tuesday)

Characters found in various DC and Marvel encyclopedias, and on comic vine.gamespot.com

Hello fellow comic book lovers! It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means! Yes, it’s time to take a look at the most bizarre comic characters. Now, grab your favorite Graphic Novel, and let’s begin!

  • Kite-Man Real Name: Charles Brown Status: Villain Creator: DC First Appeared: Batman #133 (1960) Powers/Weapons: Various Kite-Based Gadgets

As a child, Charles was always fascinated by kites. When he became an adult, he became the pathetic Kite-Man. He used a variety of kites to commit crimes, but was stopped by Batman on many occasions. He eventually met his end at the hands of the “Psychopathic Cannibal”, Bruno Mannheim.

kite.png

 

  • Codpiece Real Name: N/A Status: Villain Creator: Rachel Pollack of Vertigo Comics First Appeared: Doom Patrol #70 (1993) Powers/Weapons: Power suit and groin cannon (PFTTT)

When Codpiece was a high school, he asked a popular girl out. He was denied and told he wasn’t big enough. Thinking that she was taking about his dick, Codpiece made a power suit with a groin cannon. As an adult, he started committing crime and breaks into a bank. In an awesome turn of events, he meets his end at the hands of the Transgender superhero, Coagula. (WTF!)

codpiece